Everything is freaking me out, what makes things so hard? Damn it, hell it. You, you, you and you are all same, doing the same thing to me, disappointment, madness, hurts and pains. Do you think I deserve these? Hell no! Leave me far far away if you're going to treat me like this. I'm freaking tired on all of you. Did I do something wrong or did I make you upset? Why can't you just open your hell mouth and tell me that? Stop doing this to me! Damn it. Don't ever act like your are generous or friendly enough in front of me anymore, you're just another hypocrite I've met. You told me that you're sincere to friends? Do you think I'm blind now? Even though whatever you said was true but you can never run away from the word JEALOUSY. Your acts really disappointed me. Though I felt that I'm silly again for listening and trusting on you, I thought you would not be the another one for me. I was so wrong on trusting another person. You told me her bad and said you will appreciate me but now you're acting exactly the same thing as what she did to me. It really doesn't make any sense. Somehow I really can't figure it out what are you really thinking of. Am I too narrow-minded? Is that all my problems thinking in these negative ways? What's make me like this is not just a single case you did on me, you did it for times. Hell. Can you stop disappointed me? You said you love me but you suffered me a lot, is that what you meant? What you want is to make me suffer a lot and you can just live your life happily with it? I don't know and I can't get what's in your mind. What you told and your act are totally different. Which one is actually the real? I'm so doubt and mess. You're just acting fine sometimes but you make me doubt right after it. Maybe I'm still thinking and hanging in the past, I just can't stop thinking whenever you're trying to do the same thing again. Is that I really think too much? Why would I care so much on it? I don't know, I know that I'm weird. Maybe there is a devil living inside my heart, makes me suffer a lot and I don't even know what to do to make me feel better. I tried not to think but I'm not blind, I can't avoid it and stop the earth from spinning. I can't pretend that everything is not existed as I wished to. I can't do it, I can't stop myself to being like this and unhappy. I can't hide my feelings in front of you, you sense everything happened on me, I can't stand it anymore and cried on your shoulders. At that moment, I felt that I can lean and depend on you. Maybe I'm stress now, because of all the stuffs, no matter about college stuffs or the people around me. I'm standing right at the edge, don't know what to do, so I chose to hide myself, again. Should I pretend that nothing happens and everything is fine? Or should I ignore and stay away from them? Can you give me some advices? Mr. Chai Soon Yip? I'm going to be crazy soon I guess. I know, its not gonna be a big deal, time can heals everything. I will be fine.

You cared me a lot. Thanks (:

Love ya~~

Muackss heh

Is that true?

People who I care and appreciate a lot doesn't even care or appreciate me.

Those who I ignore and dislike pamper me a lot.

Isn't it funny?

Isn't it weird?

I have no idea indeed, aren't they should repay me as how I treated them?

Okay la, fine...move forward!

Whatever, everything is not under my control, just accept the reality.

=))

我觉得你赢了咯，你真的赢完了。

恭喜你。

Yea, I still remember what I'd promised myself.

Okay okay, just chill....

Just pretend that I'm blind and I'm deaf.

Lazy Ong Suet Li

I had my final test for English and Art History on Friday. Guess what time I started to do my revision? 12a.m in the middle of the night the day before, and it last for only 15 minutes to do my revision x) I'm suck right? I'm damn lazy right? Curious about what I did before it? Online to play Restaurant City which I addicted the most now, from 15 level up to 28 level within 3 weeks. I'm pro in this right? After that, I was on the phone for don't know how many hours till 12a.m. Geez, crazy right? After revision for 15 minutes, I felt sleepy so I went to bed and decided to woke up at 6a.m in the morning to continue as I used to this since I was in secondary school.
Lecturer late in class for 45 minutes, she did asked us to do our last revision, guess what I did? I read comic in the class while waiting for the test. YOU CAN REALLY HIT ME. Then, the lecturer entered the class and told us it was a open book test. I was like =='' I'd wasted 15 minutes to study this and I didn't even touch my Art History, I bet that Art History was not a open book test. SWEAT.
I had two hours break after having my English test but then I went 1U with my classmates. Back to college, didn't even have time to study and started my test. Great, I didn't even know how to answer the 40 questions. Non of it. Squeezed my brain juice but it doesn't seem work at all, so I just shot the answers *cries* I got a message that time, my friend sent me some answers for the test, yes, its so shameful to do this, but I'd no other choices, I copied the answers. Sorry guys, don't be disappointed on me. I know I'm lazy. I deserve this. Aiks. HIT ME LAR.

Someone is also disappointed on my attitude that I always delay delay and delay my works. I don't seem like changing my attitude, it seems even worse than when I was in secondary school. Shame on myself hmmmph!

Holidays coming!

Hohoho...I'm having earlier semester break! No idea why its one week earlier, well, I don't care la, as long as I have my holiday. BUT, I gotta start study one week earlier for semester 2.
Actually I know thats nothing to do during holidays as usual, but I guess I'm excited because I can really get to rest more at home.
Outings? Sure! It is a must okay...
My plan in the holidays :
1. Keep my room ( Its kinda messy now ) x)
2. Read my novels (Its full of dust now )
3. Go Tmn Ehsan to find my friends and Mr. Anbarasan.
4. Yam cha
5. Shopping
6. Hmm, maybe go Kampar?
7. Have fun la x)

Went yam cha last night, I don't think I need to tell the details here 'cause someone already post it on his blog.
Anyway, I enjoyed the night, had a great chat with them, owh, I miss our secondary school life moments.
Then, went out with Jia Hau and Sheue Lin today, nice shopping moments x)
Thanks to Jia Hau who brought us there, but you still owe me a meal buahahaha!
Okay la, hit me please.

I can't stand it anymore

Please la, give me a break.
Why such thing in the world always happened on me?
Why can't I change my destiny?
I pray and I beg la, please give me a break.
Why would I entered college? What I think is to get rid of my previous life okay?
No more jealousy, argument or hurts. OMG, I can't believe this happened in college too.
I wanna bang the wall. Please, either I bang or you kill me though.
I really can't stand it anymore, fed up la.
How could this happened again and again and again?!
Its driving me crazy man!
Do people who entered college still that childish? Argh, I have no idea!
What happened to me today? What's going on?
Stop annoying me. ==
Somemore after back home from college something happened again.
Can you all just give me a break?
Stop forcing and giving me those emotion look okay?
That's too more, its enough.
You wanna say I'm emo again? Go ahead.
Why not you ask me the reasons why I'm emo before you say I'm emo?
Do you ever listen to me? What I'm saying when I'm emo means that I'm angry?
If you wanna help, I don't mind, but please don't keep pushing the faults to me.
If I'm wrong, you're wrong too.
Whatever you wanna say about me. Just go ahead.